Can I Kiss Your Boo Boo Heart?

Dad:
He has always had a thing for Madeleine.
She's older, wiser and has good dance moves. So by the time he was two, he developed a pretty solid crush on Miss M.

Miss M. turned three yesterday and we all went to celebrate. Guess who didn't take a nap in anticipation? When we got to the party, things were great for while. The Slip N Slide, pool and swings provided solid entertainment for the half dozen kids who also came to the party (and provided a welcome break for all parents involved). But then!

It happened after cake and presents. His first broken heart. Aidan managed to get some one on one time with Madeleine at her new kitchen. He was watching her and simultaneously demonstrating his culinary skills.

As you can see by her face, something very terrible is about to happen. And did happen.

With one push to the chest and one loud exclamation of "No!", Aidan stood in bewilderment for 30 seconds or more not fully comprehending that he had been dissed. But then he got it. Then he was embarrassed. Then he realized this was very, very personal. His lower lip quivered. Then it lost all form. He walked in circles spiraling with emotion seeking Mom.

Once he spotted her, it was over. The tears and the crying were volcanic. She tried to console him but he said, "No!". This was very painful stuff and only he knew the pain he was feeling.Later on, when it was time to go, Miss M. made things right. But the damage was done . The residual pain still lingered in the background.

As I was hugging him and saying good night, Aidan was saying something I didn't understand. It sounded like "hat turd". I kept repeating it and asking him if that's what he was saying. He said no, "hod hurd". Then tears welled up in my eyes as well as my wife's eyes as we understood what he was saying. I asked, "Did you say, 'heart hurt'?" He leaned into me, hugged me tight, looked over my shoulder and, with a shuddering, small voice he said, "Yeah".

I held him close for a minute then put him at arms length and asked "Can I kiss your boo boo heart?" I did, then he took his mother's hand and went to bed.

When he awoke this morning I went right into him. I said "Good morning, handsome, how's you're heart?"

He said, "All better." Then he peed on the potty.

Home Improvements With A Toddler In The House

Dad here: So, we're doing some home improvements. Specifically, we're doing a complete kitchen remodel. This is a time when you get to live in hell (or at least purgatory) for about a month. We did plan ahead though...the makeshift kitchen is in the garage. And the "dining room" is also the playroom, sun room, and living room. Imagine this. Now imagine this with a toddler and all of his 'stuff' strewn about (this is where the hell part comes in). Being child-centric, we thought it best to not disturbed youngster's routine (are you laughing yet).

Youngster, as he has previously reported, is pushing two years old. Only thing is, his real age is two while he is actually 21 months old. It is always a bad thing when your real age is older than your chronological age (just ask Dr. Roizen). So amidst the stuff and the trying to live like we're camping here are some recent gems:

1- Little Man Repeatedly turning the TV on and off (remote is broken) while proudly proclaiming "on", "on", "on","on". (We don't regularly watch TV, but when your house looks like ground zero and you live like a pilgrim, The Situation Room is oddly comforting and you need to watch it undisturbed for its full calming affect.)

2- Observing our handsome devil climb on top of, then stand on top of the coffee table, then stretch his arms out by his sides then smile like a devil and say "no mama" "no, mama" no, no no" (once removed, this behavior is repeated).

3- Constantly (really, constantly) making the animal train crash through the room with giraffe and monkey in tow causing me to have a severe case of get-this-freakin'-tune-out-of-my-head: "hop on board the animal train, come on every one!...learning about animals sure is lots of fun....." Oh, and I sprained my ankle on elephant the other morning....

4- My son keeps telling me about the "two dada's". I ask him about this: "Aidan, how many dada's are there?". He smiles big and says, "TWO DADAAAAAAAAAA".

Which reminds me...I need to have a chat with my wife.......about........the contractor(s).

I Like Big Dogs!

Even though I have 2 cats I like dogs. My friends have these really really big dogs! This is me with one of them. One of here eyes doesn't work but I love her anyway.

I Have An Idea For Halloween!

Just as My Aunt put this silly hat on my head at Easter 2007, I had an instant idea for Halloween this year...I'll go as Huckleberry Finn!

Cheesy Smile

Humor is becoming evident at 13 months.

Being a Dad: One Year On

It's been a year. Our baby boy is no longer a baby. He practices independence at every turn. He nearly walks. Soon he will run. He has favorites. He has preferences. He tries to communicate and gets frustrated. He melts people with one look or one smile. He spreads happiness wherever he goes.

He longs to go "out" and shares when he's desiring a change of scene: "All Done." I spend every possible moment with him. We play, go for walks, watch Baby Einstein together and we've been known to go out to eat together...Father and Son. Once, we went to the local diner at 7 am in feet pajamas. That was an excellent social experiment. It really taxed the brains of the 'old folks' who were regulars. "A young man with a baby? How sad, do you think the wife passed...?"

So what have I learned and how have I changed? The first thing I learned is related to the diner story above: People, especially older women, are incredibly and ignorantly biased against active Fathers. In the first few months of Aidan's life, I thought about blogging this dozens of times. It seemed nearly every day I was indirectly insulted by a "well meaning" woman (typically aged 45+). Whether it was the assumption of ineptitude, "You better be helping your wife!" or False, condescending praise: "You're doing a good job, ha ha ha..." (as in, isn't that cute, he's trying to take care of the baby, ha ha ha). My favorite, though, would be the women who after hearing the baby cry in public would automatically say, "What did you do to him? Better get him home to his Mom (presumably, that's where he belongs?)

Granted, Parenthood is about learning. Nobody, man or woman, is prepared for the immense difficulty, challenges and rewards of Parenthood. These days, however, most couples are approaching the task as a duo, sharing and juggling the job as needed. That's certainly what we have done. There is no assumption that my wife is the expert and my job is just to bring in the money. Far from it...We Both read to him, play with him, change him, love him. It's about us loving our child and giving him a strong foundation of support from a Man and a Woman: His Parents.

Second, Preparation for Parenthood pales in comparison to the real thing. I am of the opinion that it is impossible to know true unconditional love without being a Parent. I used to think prior to becoming a Parent that people were just being glib when they used to say, "you have no idea....". But it's true. You don't have a clue. The sacrifice, lack of sleep, unpredictability of it all is only learned on the job. So, Oprah, lose the "Hardest Job In the World" crap. YOU HAVE NO CLUE! To those of us in the know, you ARE being glib. And you, especially, don't have a clue about what it is to be a Working Father! Why is it only hard to be a Working Mother? That is well intentioned but, ultimately, biased thinking.

Third, I see the world differently. Period. There is always something greater than the situation I am in at the moment. That Something Greater is the fact of my Fatherhood and my Forever-Connection to my precious and beautiful son. I love him. I want him safe. I want him happy. Every minute of every day. Period. Everything else is, um, Not. So Important.

My life is deeper. My life is richer, Being a Dad.

Eating Out

eating out
Originally uploaded by dharmacat.

As you can see, I enjoy fine dining out while reading the latest novels. Here, I enjoyed peas, carrots, kidney beans and kashi o's while learning that babies have happy smiles and that, sometimes, babies cry. I am not unlike these babies that I read about which encourages me.

My Hippo Rubber Mat serves as a prophylactic, protecting me from icky public germs. Also, I am free to hand feed myself which is my preference. You should try it! My Big Duck Bib keeps me sweater clean while I do this. Neat, really.

You should go out to eat like me. It's great fun. Oh, and did you know daddies love their babies? Mommies love their babies, too.

My Birthday is Soon!

I'm going to be ONE! I look WAY different now than I did last year. You can see for yourself here.

My favorite book now is Good Night Cape Cod
and, as you can see, Chicks dig me. Especially 90 year old ones. I smile at them.

Grandpa Gives Bottle

Grandpa loves me and gave me my bottle in Shelburne Falls on this beautiful fall afternoon. It happened to be Grandma's birthday!! I love when Grandma and Grandpa can visit me. Then I can play Whoop-de-doo with Grandpa on his knee!