Things I Learn from My 3 Year-Old

My son, who is three, has a new hobby of building elaborate "mouse houses" on our (king size) bed with all the pillows and blankets within 20 sq. feet.. These houses appear to serve as cushioned bunkers 'just in case' the Big Mouse should come along and, well, SCARE us. The Mouse House building is important stuff with speciifc technical details that I am not privvy to no matter how hard I try to understand the intricacies of Mouse House building. I am corrected repeatedly about proper Mouse House building. I adjust. I adapt. I follow my son's instructions. I get it right! Or so I think. But the rules keep changing. The carrot gets harder to reach or it disappears completely. The "rules" become more elaborate/elusive.

That's about the time I ask if the Big Mouse is coming. Should we take cover? If I ASK the question, the answer is "No, not yet.". If I declare that, in fact, the Big Mouse is coming right now, "Quick, hide!" then it becomes a reality and my son plays along. We hide in whatever lame, half-conceived Mouse House is available at the moment. Then we share a great moment of suspense and togetherness until the Big Mouse is gone (or tickles our feet or fails to materialize altogether)

As an always-reflecting Educator, I take away these nuggets from these experiences with my son:

1- How often have I as a teacher moved the carrot (or changed the rules, or had vague lessons or no clear assessment/accountability) causing frustration for my students?

2- How often have I allowed the stronger personalities in a class to rule the day despite my best plans for learning?

3- How often have I simply and explicity declared what we're doing and held fast without fail for the benefit of all (becauseI know my intentions are good and the material is rich and worth knowing).

4- Do I stay focused on the Big Mouse? In other words, how meaningful and relevant is all the learning we're doing in the first place? Can it be better? Does it have traction? Will it be remembered and retained?

Have the habits to learn new things been instilled, stimulated and nurtured so that, I, as teacher no longer cease to be required? So that learning resides with the Learner.

Finally, since we know that an emotional experience is more memorable than an "informational" experience, to what extent are feelings of 'intimate anticipation' and 'excitement' palpable in my classroom. Is it still my classroom or is it our classroom where we all construct, deconstruct, start again, change, adapt, pause, reflect, share and start again?

We Went Snowshoeing!

When Thomas and Elizabeth came to my house we decided to go snowsheing. It was great fun. We walked outside in fields and through the woods. We even saw a few snow mobiles. But my favorite part was making snow angels.

When A Cat Goes Missing

She's gone. Our cat Sinki (shortened from Helsinki), that is. No explanation. She just vanished like the Mayans. Nobody remembers her escaping the house (she's a housecat). Yet here we are-four days on-with no cat. We've scoured the neighborhood, the attic, any nook and cranny on the outside of the house in and in the yard.

Her brother, Russell (the cat) cries for her and we all have an ache in our heart which is made all the more pointed when a two-year-old asks for an explanation or when he calls out for her as we walk the street searching.

Who knows the inner workings of cats? Why do they disappear? For what reason leaving behind a mystery that at least until now remains unsolved.

We love you Sinki. Come back home.

An American Prayer for My Son and I

Dave Stewart has released the song and video called An American Prayer. This blog's authors endorse Barack Obama for President and wish fervently that American's Prayers get answered this time around.

Namaste.

Will Ran At The Josh Billings Race!

Aidan here: Today was the Josh Billings race. My Dad went really fast on his bike and then after the race, my cousin Will ran in a race, too. He did great. It was fun to watch him run. He even got a ribbon at the end.



I think Will's going to come every year to the Josh Billings Race with his sister Abie and his Dad and Mom. Will's Dad is even thinking about getting a bike and riding fast with my Dad.

We went to the big party at Tanglewood when it was all over and here I am hanging out there:

Can I Kiss Your Boo Boo Heart?

Dad:
He has always had a thing for Madeleine.
She's older, wiser and has good dance moves. So by the time he was two, he developed a pretty solid crush on Miss M.

Miss M. turned three yesterday and we all went to celebrate. Guess who didn't take a nap in anticipation? When we got to the party, things were great for while. The Slip N Slide, pool and swings provided solid entertainment for the half dozen kids who also came to the party (and provided a welcome break for all parents involved). But then!

It happened after cake and presents. His first broken heart. Aidan managed to get some one on one time with Madeleine at her new kitchen. He was watching her and simultaneously demonstrating his culinary skills.

As you can see by her face, something very terrible is about to happen. And did happen.

With one push to the chest and one loud exclamation of "No!", Aidan stood in bewilderment for 30 seconds or more not fully comprehending that he had been dissed. But then he got it. Then he was embarrassed. Then he realized this was very, very personal. His lower lip quivered. Then it lost all form. He walked in circles spiraling with emotion seeking Mom.

Once he spotted her, it was over. The tears and the crying were volcanic. She tried to console him but he said, "No!". This was very painful stuff and only he knew the pain he was feeling.Later on, when it was time to go, Miss M. made things right. But the damage was done . The residual pain still lingered in the background.

As I was hugging him and saying good night, Aidan was saying something I didn't understand. It sounded like "hat turd". I kept repeating it and asking him if that's what he was saying. He said no, "hod hurd". Then tears welled up in my eyes as well as my wife's eyes as we understood what he was saying. I asked, "Did you say, 'heart hurt'?" He leaned into me, hugged me tight, looked over my shoulder and, with a shuddering, small voice he said, "Yeah".

I held him close for a minute then put him at arms length and asked "Can I kiss your boo boo heart?" I did, then he took his mother's hand and went to bed.

When he awoke this morning I went right into him. I said "Good morning, handsome, how's you're heart?"

He said, "All better." Then he peed on the potty.

I Am Learning How To Chill

the feet say it all 1
Originally uploaded by dharmacat

Although I am a toddler, I am learning how to chill and stay off of my feet. Or, more precisely, my parents are inventing ways to keep me off my feet. The most extreme example was this past weekend when they put me on this car that went on the water called a boat.

Two things that prohibited movement: 1-it was way bouncy and 2-I can't swim yet!

So, I rolled with it. Note my hand being chill, too.

Of Rock Bands, Music, Counting and Toddlers

Some bands know how to have fun. Kids love to have fun. That's why fun bands eventually make albums for kids. The latest band to do just that is the Barenaked Ladies and the album is called Snacktime. The result is a win-win situation. Young kids learn, older kids appreciate the humor and the Barenaked Ladies have (had) a blast making the album.

It's absolutely brilliant and every Mom, Dad and teacher should own a copy. Here's a video using the music from the song "7,8,9" from that album.

The Wisdom of "No!"

digital native
Originally uploaded by dharmacat

He's two.
I say: "What's your name?"
He says: "No."
"How old are you?"
"No!"
"Would you like to go outside, eat pizza, and generally have a great time right now?"
"No!!!!"

See, there's wisdom in "no". As a teacher, it probably took me 5-6 years before I realized that the first answer to any question (by a student) should be "no".

There's room to compromise after that. "Yes" creates problems. I anticipate using the word "no" a lot in the coming years, lest I hear:
"But you SAID!!....."

Of Bikes, A Toddler and $10,000.00

Because I ride a bike and because he has ridden behind me and my bike in his titanium satellite "wheeled tent", for most of his life he is bike-obsessed.









I don't subscribe to Velo News but a friend of mine does. He gives me his used copies when he's done. My son who is not yet two, reads the issues before I get a chance. This concerns me. It concerns me because bikes are expensive. The kinds of bikes Aidan points to with glee in Velo News and says "Dada!!" are exactly $5000.00 give or take a thousand. This, of course means I need to get two of them. One for him and one for me. I know he will insist on this by the time he is three.

It's a matter of credibility. The longer I hold out on said bikes, the less credibility I have as 1-a cyclist and 2-a father. The stakes are high! The main problem, at least for now, is that I earn exactly $1.84 per month blogging.

My current, singular goal (the one I am manifesting using methods described in The Secret) is to become a full-time writer/blogger by year's end. I figure, I can hold off on the bike purchases by then. In the meantime, though, in case The Secret turns out to be bogus, I am accepting donations-to preserve my standing as respected father/cyclist. Just e-mail me if you're in the mood to drop ten grand for "charity".

Snot Removal in Macy's

It happened. He sneezed. Big. We were in Macy's. Women's shoes. What to do? Like Steve Austin, the Six Million Dollar Man my eyes squinted as I looked for the answer scanning the store. Bam! The answer. 1 o'clock. Black Pumps. With the tissue paper stuff still stuffed inside them. I pounced, unstuffed, unraveled and wiped. He smiled. And we continued on until we got to perfume. Ahhhh-Choo!! I barehanded this one and walked casually out into the Great Mall Beyond. To Pretzel-time where I stole wads of napkins and wiped. The bathroom at Best Buy worked perfectly to remove the evidence.

Back to Macy's. Men's section. Shirts. Ahhh-Chooo! I cussed. The s-word.

"Dada, shit?"

(then a few seconds of silence)

"That's right, Dada's gonna buy a shit."

In The Zone

In The Zone
Originally uploaded by dharmacat

I like to play piano when Dada plays. Sometimes, I move my head around. I love music.

Toddler Takes Maiden Voyage on Bike

maiden voyage
Originally uploaded by dharmacat

Here's me on my bike! I love it. The new kitchen gives me so much space to ride. I find that riding barefoot is beneficial. I get some good traction this way. I put bear in the trunk so he's safe and won't fall. When I run over chips, it makes a crunch and then it makes one hundred million thousand more chips!! That's when I back up and make one hundred million thousand more chips. Then Dada picks me up WITH MY BIKE, too!! He takes me all the way to the sun room. Then he picks up the one hundred million thousand chips. After lunch, I'll bring the bike back in the kitchen, so me and Dada can play again. I'll have chips for lunch. I'll drop some and say "Uh Oh!" Tee Hee.

Do The Holidays Make You Feel Like This?

too much
Originally uploaded by dharmacat

Elmo came to my house! He's going to stay, too! Wow! And then I saw a bike under the light-tree-with-the-ice-and-birds. Wow. Dada said it's MINE! I rode a little while and then I saw more things under the light-tree-with-the-ice-and-birds.

I opened those things and then I got tired. So much stuff! I went to the couch. Do the holidays make you feel like this, too?

Home Improvements With A Toddler In The House

Dad here: So, we're doing some home improvements. Specifically, we're doing a complete kitchen remodel. This is a time when you get to live in hell (or at least purgatory) for about a month. We did plan ahead though...the makeshift kitchen is in the garage. And the "dining room" is also the playroom, sun room, and living room. Imagine this. Now imagine this with a toddler and all of his 'stuff' strewn about (this is where the hell part comes in). Being child-centric, we thought it best to not disturbed youngster's routine (are you laughing yet).

Youngster, as he has previously reported, is pushing two years old. Only thing is, his real age is two while he is actually 21 months old. It is always a bad thing when your real age is older than your chronological age (just ask Dr. Roizen). So amidst the stuff and the trying to live like we're camping here are some recent gems:

1- Little Man Repeatedly turning the TV on and off (remote is broken) while proudly proclaiming "on", "on", "on","on". (We don't regularly watch TV, but when your house looks like ground zero and you live like a pilgrim, The Situation Room is oddly comforting and you need to watch it undisturbed for its full calming affect.)

2- Observing our handsome devil climb on top of, then stand on top of the coffee table, then stretch his arms out by his sides then smile like a devil and say "no mama" "no, mama" no, no no" (once removed, this behavior is repeated).

3- Constantly (really, constantly) making the animal train crash through the room with giraffe and monkey in tow causing me to have a severe case of get-this-freakin'-tune-out-of-my-head: "hop on board the animal train, come on every one!...learning about animals sure is lots of fun....." Oh, and I sprained my ankle on elephant the other morning....

4- My son keeps telling me about the "two dada's". I ask him about this: "Aidan, how many dada's are there?". He smiles big and says, "TWO DADAAAAAAAAAA".

Which reminds me...I need to have a chat with my wife.......about........the contractor(s).

Come, Walk With Me.....

garden
Originally uploaded by dharmacat

I am growing up. I am, as they say, "SOOOOOO BIG". But, really, it's no big thing. I've moved on from all that. I'm interested in gardening now. Come, walk with me, let's see what we can see....

A Real, Live Bunny!

with bunny
Originally uploaded by dharmacat

I never saw a real, live bunny until I went to this Garden Festival where I petted one! It was wicked soft and smooth. I love bunnies! This one was a she. She looked like she was chewing on something but I looked at her mouth and there wasn't anything there, then I realized, she probably had some bubble gum. Next time, I'm going to see of she'll blow a bubble!

Avon Calling Males

avon calling males
Originally uploaded by dharmacat

I'm getting close to being two years old now. I was reading about college expenses and gas prices. Then I saw this article" "Avon Calling Males". I think I'll apply so I can start working and be able to buy gas and go to college.

The Man Who Has No Feet And Is Really Tall

juxtaposition
Originally uploaded by dharmacat

"Those are some freakin' weird looking feet tall man!"
Taken at Millennium Park, Chicago August, 2007. After a week from home attending his Uncle's wedding, we wanted him to blow off steam. He visited the Lincoln Park Zoo and then Millennium Park where his mind was blown by the public abstract art.

The Day Carly Made Out With Me

As a rule, I'm very modest about my looks. I know I'm a cute baby but that doesn't make my head swell. But I know that Carly likes me. A lot. Today, she made out with me. It was kind of overwhelming. She pursued me from the top of the picnic table. There was nowhere I could run. Before I knew it, she planted one straight on my face.

It was wet and I could tell she had applesauce earlier. All in all, though, it was cool. Wait 'til I tell her I'm married!